He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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