Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
