I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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