as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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