4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
