You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
You were trust falling into bushes
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
