Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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