I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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