Don't you send me to vm
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
