I am puke
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
wow bdsm is so cute
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
