Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
