I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
