Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize