its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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