at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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