The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize