She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
time to smoke my breakfast
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Randomize
