You really coming over, don't trick.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Randomize
