he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize
