Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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