i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
