College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
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