im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
You were trust falling into bushes
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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