But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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