Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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