It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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