My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
