there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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