Having a random hookup so left but love u
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize