Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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