this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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