i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm both gender and math confused
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
