The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
