am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
did you just send me my own nude
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
