Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
