Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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