I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
