Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize