Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
