so that wasnt chicken after all
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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