I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Randomize
