Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I smell stomach acid.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
