wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Randomize
