I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Your penis caused this!
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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