so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
