who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
