problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
