Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Randomize
