Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize
