No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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