so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Randomize
